Thursday, May 5, 2011


Song Title: "Lanyard Loop"
Artist: Allan Holdsworth
Search Term: "Lanyard"

Well, I suppose it was inevitable that someone would invent smooth jazz fusion, combining the unmoored improvisation of fusion with the milquetoasty and immediately tiresome tones of smooth jazz. The result is a lot of gloppy tunelessness that doesn't even possess the saving grace of freewheeling momentum, since the instruments' timbres are disgustingly timid. I know this description sounds like it might be kind of a funny idea for some sort of jazz parodist, but as this live recording concludes with enraptured applause and is not flecked with the crowd's belly laughs along the way, it appears Allan Holdsworth actually means it, please stop it Allan Holdsworth please please stop oh it burns stop it why.

I'm going on vacation for a couple weeks, so there won't be more posts here until the week of the 23rd... or ever, if something zany happens to my plane in midair! The point is I'm not just being lazy this time and I have an excuse for not updating. Have a good two weeks, Amanda!


  1. Ha! I can't possibly be your only reader, but that made me laugh anyway. It's like there's this whole blog just for my private amusement.

    Where are you going? Have fun!

  2. Glad you liked that. :) I'm going to Michigan to visit my parents, and then we're all driving to Madison to visit my brother and LeAnne. And Scott Walker. I'm flying out this time, so I sadly have to bypass Toronto, but hopefully next time I head out that way I will be able to see you guys!

  3. I thought you had vowed never set foot in Wisconsin ever again!

    Bummer that we won't get to see you, but flying would be much more pleasant than driving all that way! Besides missing out on the pleasure of our company, of course.